Bowser's Date
by Nintendo Freak
Summary: What happens when Bowser's tricked into starring on "The Dating Game Show"? And who does he go out with? (NOTE: Play Paper Mario before reading))


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Author's Note: Well, here's my first Mario Fic! I been wondering for ages- what if Bowser was on a Dating Show? And what if the three choices where- well, unexpected? Also, if you don't know who Bow is, and some other characters, play Paper Mario! Oh yea, what do you call those poker things that look like chips?...

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. But if I get sued, it would be Fanfiction.net's fault for letting people post stories. Also, If I did own Nintendo, it would be all messed up, and Luigi would have a kid.

Now for our feature presentation.....

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A Freak Presentation

Bowser's Date

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Mario laid down is cards. "I win!," said the happy Princesses Boo, Bow. She greedily pulled a huge stack of poker coins. Luigi slammed his head on the table. Kooper looked like he was going to choke into tears. Princess Peach and Bombette stood next to Bow, who was sitting in a chair, or more like floating, while smiling. Watt took out his pacifier, and put it on the table. Kooper stared sickly at it. "Goldfish!!," he said, smiling. Everyone groaned. "Watt, this is POKER, not GOLDFISH!!," Luigi yelled. Hi continuously banged his head on the nearby wall.

A thought had flew into Luigi's mind while he was banging his head. He grinned evilly. He slowly turned around. He jumped into his seat. "Hey Bow- how about a bet?," Luigi grinned. Mario and Kooper looked up at him in hope, while Watt was playing Goldfish with an invisible friend. "Bow, If I win this bet- I have all of your chips- no wait- you can KEEP your chips, just do one favor I ask you. And if you win, you can keep your chips."

Bow looked at him strangely. "This isn't right...either way I get the chips...OK!," she said. Bow held up her cards. "Strait Kings!!," she said. Luigi looked sad. Suddenly, he burst into laughter, as he brought up his cards: "All jacks! Boo-ya!," he said, dancing around the room, madly. Kooper and Mario cheered, while Peach smirked. "What is this favor, Luigi?," she asked, slyly. He stopped dancing around the room.

Luigi sat down. He sighed. "Star on the Dating Game Show." Bow opened her mouth wide, as if she was going to bite him. "WHA-AT!?!," she groaned. He flew up. "Ok, fine...," she said. Peach and Bombette were snickering silently. "And they have to go on it, too." Two screams where heard all over Mushroom Kingdom.

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In Bowser's Castle...

Bowser sat at his throne, thinking about that stupid plumber. It wasn't _his _fault he was getting paid only minimum wage. Suddenly, one of his savants rushed in. "King Bowser! King Bowser!!," the toadstool yelled. "The mailman- he's attacking the chomps!," he panted. Bowser sighed.

The toad flung a rock at one of the Chomps, making them fall over to the ground. He cackled evilly, and jumped at another one. They fell helplessly, as he ran for his goal: the mailbox. He was almost there....

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CHOMP!!!!!!!

The servant ran back outside. As soon as he saw the mailman, he laughed, then stopped, as if it never happened. He showed the mailman into Bowser's throne room. The guards all were gaffing. Bowser looked at the mailman as he staggered in. The servant tried the stifle his laughter. He motioned him to turn around. The toad sighed, and turned around. Suddenly, all of the servants and guards were laughing, including Bowser. The bottom of the toads pants where bitten out of, revealing underwear with bright red polka-dots on them. 

The mailman slowly walked up to Bowser, and slowly gave him a pack of letters. He ran out, as his pants fell down, and he tripped. He got up, and jumped out a window. Bowser looked at the mail. "Bills, Bills, Bills, Bills, blackmail, chain letter, chain letter, blackmail, jury duty, jury duty, jury duty, bill, blackmail, - an exception to a game show?," he said. He opened up the thick envelope. He read the letter. What, you didn't know he could read?:

_ Koopa King Bowser,_

You have been selected from over 500 contestants to star on the Dating Game Show. Because of your un-response to the last 12 letters asking you to accept the choosing or not. Your un-response stood as a yes. You must come to The Dating Show set tomorrow morning at 6:00 a.m. The show will start at 7:00 a.m. You must attend by law. 

Chuck Quizzmo

Bowser grumbled. "Is there any way I can avoid this?," he said, shoving the letter into a servants hands. The servant got a huge frozen smile on his face. Air went through his teach and a low gargling sound came from his throat. "Wipe that smile off of your face, or I'll wipe it off for you!," Bowser roared. The servant jumped, and squealed. "I'm sorry, my lord- but its by law...and if you tried not to go, well...." Bowser sighed. Tomorrow would be a loooong day.

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But back at Mario's house, they had their own problems...

Bow, Peach, and Bombette looked at Luigi in horror. "I refuse to go on that show!," said Peach. "I'm engaged to Mario!." Mario looked at her, and laughed his plumber butt off. "I think you have me mistaken for someone else...," he said. Peach blushed, and shut up. "I- I can't g on that show- errm, I have a boyfriend back in town!!," Bombette said. Kooper laughed. "You don't have a boyfriend! That guy loves you, and you hate him!!." Bow floated in the air, with no excuse. She sighed.

"Ok, when do we have to leave?" "Tomorrow morning at six" "Ok- but if there's some OTHER catch, I will slap you!," Bow said. Luigi shuddered. You don't want to know how her slap attack feels like. Or worse, her fan attack... Luigi had sent the trick letter to Bowser. He knew a big idiot like him would buy it. Luigi cackled at the thought of Peach or Bow going out with Bowser on a date- or Bombette...explosions everywhere! He tuned around to see Watt eating some ice cubes.

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So, how was the first chapter of the story? Funny? Corny? Short? Stupid? Please tell me in your reviews, and I'll answer any questions you'll have. It's about time someone made a fic about Bowser going on a date, or something like that...


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